tuesday 27th January 2009

Like most furry tundra bound predators, I shun the cold, and have thus been in hibernation for a couple of months. Nourished only by the instinct to survive against all odds in this harsh unforgiving wilderness. And a healthy supply of vodka bearing rosy cheeked women. We’re in Barcelona.. The webcam is replaced.. fortunately it’s pointing forward, so you can’t see that a large portion of the ships hindquarters is missing. We found a spot of rust.

We are set to emerge soon enough like the proverbial butterfly in the spring, all new and brilliant. A cleaner, leaner version, we’re all about the environment, and in light of the unfortunate current climate we’re taking on board a host of new policies aimed at conservation, waste limitation and altogether jolly good chappedness. We are setting the standard for such ground breaking eco friendly technologies as solar propulsion and are in the process of fitting panels that will take us around the world at a fraction of the cost. The only drawback being that the panels float behind us on a makeshift barge the size of New York state. And we can’t sail at night. Or if its cloudy.

Other ecologically sound policies we are investigating include the saving of generator fuel by the sacrificial burning of spent crew members and the bulk purchase of cost effective food alternatives such as badgers milk and boil-in-the-bag vicar in butter sauce.   We have also elected to sail exclusively downhill to save energy.

I have to go now as there’s a ringing sound in my head.

Keeping it real…